Ever since September 11, 2001, all Americans have had a heightened awareness of personal and national security. Most didn't realize until now that supertight security was already a top priority for at least one famous fast-food chain.

Namely, the eating empire created by Colonel Harland Sanders, whose "secret blend of 11 herbs and spices" made his Kentucky Fried Chicken a top seller around the world.

Company sources say the top-secret blend of herbs and spices was originally handwritten in 1940 by Colonel Sanders on a sheet of yellow legal paper. After the colonel realized people loved chicken heaped with his herbs, he decided the recipe needed to be guarded at all times.

Unfortunately, high-tech security measures were non-existent, so the colonel placed the recipe in an off-the-shelf file cabinet with two combination locks. The Hamburglar could have cracked it with a crowbar.

Last year KFC officials figured the secret recipe needed to be in a safer place in case the Taliban or Nancy Pelosi attacked KFC headquarters.

The formula was whisked out of town in the dead of night and for five months remained at a top secret location unknown to even Jack Bauer, who tried — and failed — to torture the recipe's location out of Mrs. Winner, who once courted the colonel in hopes of ripping off the Original Recipe.

In early February, the hallowed document returned to Kentucky in a briefcase attached to a man's wrist, just like the national nuclear codes.

KFC President Roger Eaton said he was glad to see the recipe returned home safely.

"It was very nerve-wracking," Eaton said. "I don't want to be the only president who's lost the recipe."

The document is now tucked in a vault guarded by enough high-tech gizmos to make a banker blush. Security features include motion detectors and cameras that allow guards to monitor the vault around the clock.

So Colonel Sanders' recipe remains secret, but another company may soon wish they had kept the ingredients in their product under wraps. Unless they really, really believe the world's beverage consumers are ready for a refreshing swallow of cow urine.

Yes, cow urine. In case you're wondering, the product will not be called Cow-Ca Cola. Nor will it be named "Cowk, as reader Stan Henley suggested. Henley even created a tacky motto: "Urine-a class by yourself when you drink Cowk."

You won't be surprised to learn the beverage isn't the brainchild of a soft drink maker. The idea was hatched by the Cow Protection Department of the Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS), India's biggest and oldest Hindu nationalist group.

RSS official Om Prakash said the drink, called "gau jal," or "cow water," was sure to be a hit with cow-loving Hindus. "Don't worry, it won't smell like urine and will be tasty, too," Prakash told The Times of London. "It will be devoid of any toxins."

That's a relief. Nothing ruins a refreshing drink like the taste of toxins.

Prakash claims regular soft drinks are unhealthy and contain dangerous levels of pesticides. He said his cow urine would only be altered by a few medicinal herbs. (Hopefully one that helps nausea).

The drink will debut in India, but Prakash believes cow pee has mass appeal that could compete with giants like Pepsi and Coke.

"We're going to give them good competition, as our drink is good for mankind," Prakash said.

Good for mankind? Maybe so. But I'm betting potential consumers would be happier if the RSS had kept their secret ingredient between themselves and the cows. On the bright side, this is one product KFC officials won't lose any sleep over. You don't need a sample to know it sure doesn't taste like chicken.

(Send your e-mail comments to: alex@ newnan.com)