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'I hate my job' Submitted by Lindy When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this: On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson; be very sure you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect th... More ... Happy Birthday! "Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?" "Yes. What can I do for you?" "I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor, Virgil Smith. He's hidin' marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there. More ...
Lose over 12 pounds in less than a week by Terry Toole Just in time for Christmas, kind of. Would you like to lose over 12 pounds in less than a week? Sounds just right after an over-eating at Thanksgiving and the anticipation of doing the same over the Christmas parties and family gettogethers. Wrong! More ...
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by Alex McRae Expect bomb shelter sales to soar this holiday season since word has arrived that Iran quit trying to build nuclear bombs in 2003. Normally, this kind of news would be greeted with cheers. But there's one big problem. The intelligence reports that allegedly prove Iran may not be making nuclear we... More ...
by Ren Summerlin He was deep in concentration. So I just let him think. I rubbed Queenie Jr. on the head and looked in her ears. Queenie Jr. moaned and looked at me as if to say, "Well Done." Cleotus Allegood looked up, too, and sighed, "Just don't know what to do, Ren. Just don't know what to do. The Old Lady do... More ... How To Install A Home Security System In The South 1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots. 2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and your NRA magazines. 3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine. More ...
by Katie Smith There are times when you get surprises. Sunday morning was my day. I got up and went into the bathroom, got my bath and behold out of the spare bed room walks my son, Rudolph. He had got home around fiveor six o'clock, went to bed without disturbing me. I did not get too excited, but I was reall... More ...
Read the Story... A merry christmas message Dear Mr. Toole, I have something I'd like to say, Merry Christmas. I want to say Merry Christmas to the bag lady, the hooker, the drunk, the junkie, the homeless man on the street, the lesbian lady down road, and the raciallymixed couple that everyone looks down on, do you know that Jesus hung ou... More ... A well taught lesson is one well remembered submitted by F.C. Garrett Back in September of 2005, on the first day of school, Martha Cothren, a social studies school teacher at Robinson High School in Little Rock, did something not to be forgotten. On the first day of school, with the permission of the school superintendent, the principal and the building supervisor,... More ... Learning"how to call mother".... submitted by cangrow A six-year-old ran up and down the supermarket aisles shouting frantically, "Helen, Helen!" Finally reunited with his mother, he was chided by her, "You shouldn't call me "Helen." I'm your mother, you know." "I know," said the child, "but the store is full of mothers. More ...
Sons of Confederate Veterans Camp #2071 by Bobby Tully Rock Island Rock Island, Illinois - The first 468 Confederate prisoners at Rock Island Prison Camp arrived at the 12 acre site just before Christmas 1863 - captured near Chattanooga, Tennessee. Nearly 20 months later, more than 1,960 prisoners had died from smallpox, pneumonia, dysentery, and ot... More ... Seasonal choir submitted by Jack Warner It was visitor's day at the lunatic asylum. All the inmates were standing in the courtyard and singing "Ava Maria." They were singing it beautifully. But oddly, each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and tapping it rhythmically with a pencil. More ... As You See It Colquitt voters are getting what they wanted: an absentee mayor! Once again the city council meeting has been postponed so he can attend. For those who would like to know what the churches "are doing for Christmas"-- I would encourage you to attend one of your choice a little more often and perha... More ... Five surgeons submitted by: Lindy Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on. The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is c... More ... Similes fromtheBible submitted by FC Garrett Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married? A. Ruthless. Q. What do they call pastors in Germany? A. German shepherds. Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation. More ... The seniorpastor submitted by cangrow Many years ago, while watching a little TV on Sunday instead of going to church, I watched a Church in Atlanta honoring one of it's senior pastors who had been retired many years... He was 92 at that time and I wondered why the Church even bothered to ask the old gentleman to preach at that age. More ... Men are happier people Submitted by Garland Mears What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear no shirt to a water park. Car mechanics t... More ... ---God and rain--- Submitted by: Lindy One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town, taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick. Suddenly, my daughter, Aspen, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat. "Dad, I'm thinking of something. More ... |
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